Imaginary Weight Gain
by Vexa Leonhart
Summary: Prucan oneshot, Gakuen AU, fluff. Gilbert gets called into Matthew's room to discuss a seemingly random topic that distresses his Canadian lover to no extent. "So.. You promise to love me even if I do get really fat?" Matthew sniffled. "Of course," Gilbert chuckled in reply, "I love you, Birdie, for ever and ever, and even if the scales break."


_**Characters: **Gilbert (Prussia), Matthew (Canada) and mentions of Alfred (America)._

_**Pairings: **Prucan_

_**Warnings:** Coarse language, sexual references, partial nudity, self-conscious Canadian's... and high risk of death by fluff suffocation~ Basically, Prucan shonen-ai..._

_**Disclaimers: **Yeah, I totally own Hetalia. I totally DREW a webcomic and wrote it in Japanese, I totally researched stereotypes and world history... and I totally did not just claim this... If you get what I mean...  
__ I don't own Hetalia. Nor do I own the adorable Disney Pixar film Wall-E... But I own Matthew's ass... Kidding~ If I did I'd be murdered by Gilbert... I don't fancy that._

_**Xi-Xi's Promised Prucan Oneshot!**_

_**V/N: **(Vexa's Note) *Pout* And I really wanted to read a Prucan lemon in the cupboard fic… But apparently it doesn't exist, or I haven't found it yet…_

_Well, here's your Prucan Gakuen, fluffy humour with a hint of angst oneshot, Xianta._

* * *

_Shitshitshitshitshitshit…_

_How the hell did this happen? It couldn't have been that thing last week? No, that was a week ago, he'd of noticed the signs earlier if it had been from last week… Did he do it this week? He didn't recall-OH!_

_Oh maple…_

"GILBERT!" Matthew wailed, quite quietly if you were anyone but the awesome Prussian, who just happened to have awesome hearing. (Uh, anyway, back on track…)

It took no longer than five seconds flat for footsteps to be heard outside the shy Canadian's dorm room before the door was thrown open to rebound against the wall as a white haired, pale, red eyed and awesome Prussian basically threw himself into his sweet little lovers room with a panicked and protective look on his face. In his pale hands he clutched a metallic baseball bat (Jeez, who plays baseball? Except for the American's of course, I do believe that it's their sport…).

"Where's Francis!? I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL KILL HIM FOR LAYING A HAND ON MY CUTE LITTLE BIRDIE! I'LL RIP HIS BALLS OFF, I'LL-"

Crimson eyes blinked as he assessed the room and found that there was no blonde Frenchman, only the Canadian's normal dorm room, cluttered with books and papers as usual, with the only abnormality being the shirtless Canadian standing in front of the full length mirror in his Maple Leaf boxers, a distraught look in his violet eyes, and though his long wavy blonde hair was still slightly wet from a recent shower, that one stubborn curl still managed to bounce in front of the Canadian's petite face.

"Uhm… Birdie? Is something wrong?" Gilbert asked, unsure as to what to do when he was called into his boyfriend's dorm room to find him shirtless… He may be a pervert and all but he really is quite awkward when it comes to sex… Who can blame him? After growing up with Elizabeta of all people…

"Yes! There is something wrong, don't pretend it isn't obvious Gil!" Matthew cried, turning around and facing his boyfriend with tears in his eyes, which in all honesty struck something in Gilbert that made him want to punch the nearest wall… Damn it, ever since that Maybe Baby ordeal he's been feeling this more often!

"Mattie, listen to me, I don't know what you're talking about. So, would you mind just telling me because I think we both know I won't be figuring it out on my own anytime soon," Gilbert said slowly, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as he made sure to avoid coming off as some insensitive bastard, as he'd been called on many occasions by Elizabeta.

The albino Prussian jumped slightly when his Canadian lover suddenly slapped his hands to his bare stomach and gave the flesh there a slight shake, drawing crimson gave to the exposed skin there, and caused a single white brow to lift up higher on his forehead, confused as to why his little lover just slapped and wiggled his belly… His really cute, smooth belly…

"This, Gil! This is the problem!"

"Your drool-worthy midriff? I'll say! There aren't any hickeys on it yet! Jeez, I can't believe I've never noticed your sexy stomach~" The Prussian leered, as he placed the metal bat against the wall and closed the door, stepping further into the room to get it closed.

"Stop joking around, Gil! This is serious!" Matthew cried, not even blushing at the sexual comments being made… This worried the albino to no extent.

"What's serious, Matthew? Because I really don't see anything wrong with your stomach," Gilbert said in a soft tone (*fangirling over sweet!Gil~).

"Gil! Look at me," Matthew said; repeating the action of clutching the flesh of his stomach and jostling it, "I'm getting fat, Gil!"

Cue the astonished silence, broken by a few self-pitying sniffles on the Canadian's part.

"Birdie…? Are you kidding me?" Gilbert asked, the corners of his lips pulling up slightly, to which the Canadian replied indignantly with a "It's not funny, Gil!" which gained no reply from the albino in turn, "Matthew, you're not fat. You're a perfectly normal weight for a guy your age and stature."

"You're just trying to make me feel better, I'm not perfect. I'm fat, you're perfect," and within a few steps the Canadian was across the room and pulling up the front of Gilbert's shirt to reveal toned, granted very pale, abs. "See! Why can't I have a stomach like you!? Instead I'm just fat…"

"Matthew…" Gilbert sighed, taking a hold of the Canadian's slim wrists and gently getting him to remove his grip from his T-shirt. He was about to continue his protest when the Canadian gasped cutely.

"Gil! I'm going to get really fat one day! I'm going to turn out like Alfred, eating every minute of every day! Except I won't be eating hamburgers, they suck, I'll be eating pancakes and bacon with maple syrup and I'm going to get so fat that I'm going to have to sit in one of those floaty chairs from the Wall-E movie because I'll eventually lose the use of my legs because of all the fat and-mph!"

The 'mph!' being the noise of which the small Canadian emitted when his mouth was suddenly smothered by a chaste kiss from a chuckling Prussian.

"Sweetheart," Gilbert chuckled, as he pulled away from the lightly blushing Canadian, of course, not retreating too far from Matthew's face. "You don't realise just how adorable you are when you go on your little rants involving references to kid's movies."

"But Gil! I'm going to get fat and I'm not going to be attractive anymore and you won't love me-"

"Nothing can ever make me stop loving you, Matthew. You got that? You are the kindest, cutest, funniest person I've ever met and a little bit of imaginary weight gain will never change that. Even if you do get fat and have to use a chair to move around, I swear to God I will buy a double chair and sit in it for eternity with you, and if they don't have floating chairs then I'll just wheel you around in a wheelchair. I will never find you unattractive; I will always love you, sweetheart, 'til the end of time, and to the ends of the earth, of the universe, even! Because I love you that much, and if you think that a little fat tissue is going to change that, well then, I should probably get around to teaching you a thing or two, shouldn't I?" With their foreheads lightly pressed together like this, and red eyes staring sweetly into teary violet irises, pale hands holding the sides of a feminine face, it was the supreme picture of sweet love.

((I feel so corny… But I should probably get used to writing this stuff…))

"So… You promise to love me even if I do get really fat?" Matthew sniffled.

"Of course," Gilbert chuckled in reply, moving his hands from their place on either side of Matthew's face to his hips, where he squeezed them gently, while moving his face into the crook of Matthew's neck and placing a feather light kiss there.

"I love you, Birdie, for ever and ever, and even if the scales break."

"I love you, too… Pooh Bear~"

* * *

_**V/N:**__ AWWWWW! How sweet! I know I wrote it but I still think It's cute~_

_Well, I attempted to add in a little bit of angst but it was a lot fluffier than anything… A dash of humour~_

_I really tend to write better late at night, I'll have to keep that in mind~ Sorry the start was so… stupid and crappy. I just had to get a feel for it, is all…_

_I absolutely adore Gilbert's 'Pooh Bear' nickname, and the thought of Matthew using it in their fluffy, adorable moments makes me fangirl inside!_

_Well, there you go Xi-Xi~_


End file.
